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Thursday, 7 November 2013

MYSTERY SHOPPER

From my book Rolling In The Aisles (poking fun at shops, shoppers and shopping) available here:



MYSTERY SHOPPER

??????? is a mystery shopper,
A customer service snooper,
Spying on the staff and store,
Looking for every blooper.

They search for the good and the bad,
They look for the ugly too,
Service with a smile or a frown,
And even the state of the loo.

??????? tries hard to act normal,
??????? tries hard to fit in,
Shopping the aisles and departments,
Observing everything within.

You’ll never identify them,
Could be a lad or a lass,
They don’t wear any name badges
And don’t carry a security pass. 

They have the sharp eyes of a hawk,
Their senses are keen as an eagle,
They can blend in like a chameleon
And have the nose of a sniffing beagle.

Eventually their report is delivered,
The store manager’s heart is pumping,
Is it red, amber or green,
Will it be praise or a bloody good thumping?

??????? the mystery shopper,
Gets ready for another day,
Look out stressed-out store managers,
They might be coming your way.....

.....or they might already have been!






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